Ancient things never change

Over the weekend, a conversation turned to the somewhat tired topic of people who believe that Stonehenge and the Pyramids (a.k.a. anything ancient and big which took a lot of effort) could not have been built by humans. We glossed over it quickly and got on to more satisfying topics. But that very night I was reading the History of the Danes, by Saxo Grammaticus, written about 1200 A.D. And here was this funny parallel:

"That the country of Denmark was once cultivated and worked by giants, is attested by the enormous stones attached to the barrows and caves of the ancients. Should any man question that this is accomplished by superhuman force, let him look up at the tops of certain mountains and say, if he knows how, what man hath carried such immense boulders up to their crests. For anyone considering this marvel will mark that it is inconceivable how a mass, hardly at all or but with difficulty movable upon a level, could have been raised to so mighty a peak of so lofty a mountain by mere human effort, or by the ordinary exertion of human strength. But as to whether, after the Deluge went forth, there existed giants who could do such deeds, or men endowed beyond others with bodily force, there is scant tradition to tell us."

It's sobering to note that these things were ancient even 800 years ago. Sadly, it's easier to believe in supernatural causes than to believe that some group of humans just worked very hard. Compared to today, yes, there were "men endowed beyond others with bodily force" back then: simply men who would work themselves (or slaves) to death for goals whose importance has since been lost. 6 to 10 ordinary people can flip a car. We've all probably seen videos of bodybuilders pulling fire engines or bulldozers, even using just their teeth. I can easily picture what 100 or 1,000 strong men can do. I just don't see a disconnect. These things have never been impossible.

Getting reamed

Here's what my friend Doug would call "one of those moments of serendipity when things just come together."

I was printing packing slips to mail out a bunch of eBay lots, when I ran out of paper. I went out to the garage to grab another ream. I looked at the stack and said, "Six reams, okay, I won't have to buy paper for a while." That's good. I have a knack of always trying to inventory things.

But when I got back to the computer and clicked on the next order, the customer's last name was Reams!

Now I know from experience that if you read books with the TV on in the background, about every two hours a word will be spoken at the same moment that you read the same word in print. Depends on the types of shows & books. But in over 10 years of genealogy research, having seen tens of thousands of names, and having shipped out over 10,000 batches of stamps around the world ... I didn't know Reams was even a real last name. Never saw it until just now, less than 10 seconds after counting my reams of paper.

;-)

words of unwisdom

With enough research we can prove that everything is something, except when something is nothing, and nothing is good enough.

My "strange utterance of the week" when responding to facebook messages. I like the ring of it. Clearly i've been corrupted by old Bob Dylan songs: "I've heard you say many times | that you're better than no one | and no one is better than you. | If you really believe that | you know you're got nothing to win | and nothing to lose." From "Ramona."

No paramedics ... or not

It's a bit disorienting when the Unlikely strikes close to home.

We had an odd episode last night (March 2010). Lifeline called us to let us know our elderly neighbor had fallen down, and we needed to go check on her. She was fine, and we got her back in bed. They called again to see how she was. We said she was fine, and no services were needed. Last time, the paramedics came out and there was a big argument when they tried to drag her to the hospital in the middle of the night -- I know they mean well, and that time she had a small bump on her head and we wanted to be sure she was okay. But this time, no. No medical help was needed. Lifeline said they were glad to hear she was okay, and no paramedics would be sent.

So we went back home, glad it wasn't something serious.

Barely ten minutes later we heard a fire truck rumbling up the street. Through the door, there it was, headed for the old neighbor's house. And we heard the ambulance right behind. Jeez. This was going to be fun. They were going to need us to let them in the house so they could scare the crap of our neighbor and get another big argument going. But wait ... they stopped two houses further down, where we knew there was another old lady we'd never actually met.

We were all ready to run out there and try to be helpful or annoyed (hard to tell which), but we would have looked like crazy people, because it was a completely unrelated call for help.

It's not like we get ambulances on our block all the time. Maybe once a month someone within a 20-house radius needs help. But here it was, twice in the same half hour, two houses apart. Unlikely times.

Barbie turns 50

Here's something I never thought I'd write about - Barbie. But she fits right in here. What were the odds that a toy based on "a sexually-themed gag toy for men", based on "a cartoon character 'who was essentially a prostitute,'" would end up selling million of units to children around the world? While I have tried to stay away from silly human behavior on this blog, I'll use a bit of poetic license and say that Barbie is a phenomenon.

Anyway, Barbie turned 50 today. It's all over the news. But this raises some deep (I mean not-so-deep) questions ...

Do plastic people have birthdays? At what age will she start needing plastic surgery? Then again, she ages in "plastic years", and considering the rate at which plastic decays, 50 years is only about 20 minutes old!

My quotes came from this article from CNN.com.

Thanks for the tweet from EchelonPress to put these gags in my head. Now they're in your head. Enjoy.

Lightning loops

Living in southern California, I miss thunderstorms. We get maybe a few rumbles each year -- nothing like the storms we'd get when I was growing up back east. I've always been fascinated by lightning, and having watched many storms in the distance, I've seen odd things, like lightning that skims along the bottoms of clouds. And lightning that loops back into the clouds without hitting the ground. I've always wondered how rare these really are.

Looping lightning is not rare, but photos of it are. See this article for a nice example:

Source: USA Today "Looping lightning is rare, but not unknown" (31 Aug 01)

Lightning follows the path of least resistance (okay, impedence), and the air under a storm is naturally churned up. Still, it was a bit of a surprise to hear that cloud-to-cloud lightning happens "10 times as often as lightning that hits the ground."

Sometimes we tune out the common stuff. Most lightning stories we hear are of buildings and trees being struck and people killed. There's no human interest in stories about lightning that doesn't hit the ground. So, having never spoken much about it, it ends up seeming unlikely. seems like our perceptions of reality have looped without touching the ground.

Pop go the hay bales

Last month there were enormous wildfires in Australia, but as that continent bakes in the summer sun, there are other hazards. Like hay bales and entire sheds of hay exploding. Last year (2008) was "the worst season ever for spontaneous hayshed fires." [1]

It's not as sensational or mysterious as spontaneous human combustion, but it has the benefit of being verifiably real. The first article I found estimates some 400 cases of sudden hayshed fires in New South Wales alone, though it's not clear whether this is only for 2008 or for some longer period. [1] "One German study using data from an insurance company reported 304 haystack fires between 1970 and 1980, dropping to 118 between 1980 and 1990 due to the insurance company distributing 2500 hay thermometers to fire brigades since 1980." [3, quoting Wolk and Sarkar, 1993]

Oddly, it's not the driest bales that burst into flame, but ones with a moisture content around 20%. The moisture allows bacteria to thrive, and my initial impression is that the bacteria could be producing methane. However, the explosions are the result of bacteria raising the core temperature of the hay bale to 76 degrees C, and the ignition is just a reaction with oxygen. [1,2]

"The phenomena of exploding haystacks has been with mankind for as long as he has been making hay. Pliny, the Roman Philosopher wrote in 60BC, 'When the grass is cut it should be turned towards the sun and must never be stacked until it is quite dry. If this last precaution is not carefully taken a kind of vapour will be seen arising from the rick in the morning, and as soon as the sun is up it will ignite to a certainty, and so be consumed.'" [3]

It's odd that something which has been known and documented for over 2,000 years still sounds absurd and unlikely, but a lot of farming procedures and parameters are largely unknown to the general public.

1. Bizarre weather sends hay bales up in flames (News.au.com, Jan 21 08)

2. Spontaneous Combustion of Hay (PDF) (Dep't of Primary Resources, South Australia - PIRSA)

3. The Case of the Exploding Haystacks: Spontaneous Combustion of Natural Products in New Zealand (Australian Biotechnology, March/April 1997)